While the Soft Taco’s got an aptly named “soft” outer shell, a journal full of poetry about its feelings, and a 100% track record of crying during movies based on paperback novels with shirtless dudes on the cover, the Crunchy Taco has a much tougher outer shell.

Instead of a warm flour tortilla, the Crunchy Taco has a crunchy corn body and a wicked haymaker. It’s the kind of taco that will bare‐knuckle‐box a roadside trucker. It knows how to live “off the grid” for up to three years. It will not tolerate you playing power chords on an acoustic guitar. Hard. Crunchy. Delicious.