Cheesy Gordita Crunch

Better Than a Rare Comet

You know how every once in a while, there will be that one special comet that everybody decides is important enough to sit in the cold and stare blankly at the sky for at least ten minutes? The Cheesy Gordita Crunch is like that comet.

Your mom, or your science teacher, or maybe just some guy who you always assumed knew what he was talking about, will be all “Tacospacerock Comet is only visible one night every 95 years. It’s going to be incredible!” So you pause whatever video game you’re playing at 10:56pm, wander outside, and stare into the night sky with all your neighbors while a vaguely orange-ish star-like thing slowly fades into view for about five minutes. Ultimately, it’s super underwhelming, but you still do it because that Tacospacerock Comet (which we made up by the way), is a rare phenomenon. Things like that don’t come around very often. It’s special. But you still take a selfie while attempting to photobomb the comet and caption it something catchy like “Tacospacerock. More like Tacospacerock with it.”

So what does this have to do with the Cheesy Gordita Crunch you ask? Well, if you are asking the question, then you clearly haven’t tried it yet. Not unlike that allegedly awesome comet, the Cheesy Gordita Crunch is a rare, special part of the world that’s worth taking a moment to appreciate. Not often does a food innovation come along that completely transforms the way we eat, yet the Cheesy Gordita Crunch has become a lasting staple of our personality as Taco Bell. It’s a privilege to witness a culinary phenomenon of this magnitude during our tiny slice of life on this earth. It could be because the Cheesy Gordita Crunch is made with a hard taco shell filled with seasoned beef, lettuce, real cheddar cheese and spicy ranch sauce all tucked nicely in a piece of flatbread with melted three cheese blend. Way better than comets though, right? Since the Cheesy Gordita Crunch is not going away anytime soon, you can totally eat it, and you don’t have to crane your neck or listen to your mom make up stuff about astrology to enjoy. But you can still take the selfies with the Cheesy Gordita Crunch and post them because of course you would want to. We get it.