No Room for Lettuce

Sorry, lettuce, RSVP is closed.

No, I get it, your friend Seasoned Beef is DJing tonight. But unless you’re on the list, you can’t get in. Oh, you’re a personal friend of the promoters Beans and Cheese? Well, how about you give them a call, let them know you’re out here in line, and maybe I can let you in. Oh, you don’t have their number? I see, so now your dad owns the club, huh? Well, the owner Reduced Fat Sour Cream is coming down now, so I’m sure he’ll take you, his child, straight to the VIP lounge where you belong huh? Sir? Oh, you don’t know this guy? That’s what I thought. Hey nacho cheese sauce! Get this lettuce character out of my sight; I don’t want him anywhere near the door to this burrito.