“HOW DO YOU DEW?” FROM THE DEEP END
A cautionary tale.
Mountain Dew® Baja Blast® Zero Sugar... zero sugar, yet all the original flavor of everyone’s favorite fountain drink. How can one beverage be so empty yet so full at the same time? Consider this…You’re a young, excitable college student. Let’s say your name is Toby. Yep, Toby. After a night of hitting the books, Toby, you tuck in and fall asleep at 1:31 AM only to dream about diving toes-first into an Olympic-sized swimming pool of refreshing Mtn Dew® Baja Blast®, mouth open wide, taking it all in, gulp, gulp, gulp, blissful in your Dew-phoria, just floating, floating, floating, guuuuuulp, wade a little, wade a lot, wade a little bit more, ahhhh, open swim is over but the Dew Crew gave you an after-hours all-access key so you’ve got the place to yourself, YESSSS, gulp, gulp, gulp, and now here you are perfecting your freestyle stroke, snagging a generous slurp of the Dew each time you turn that cute head of yours for air, thinking, “Who needs air when you’ve got delicious Baja Blast®?” and you’re like, “Oh wow, this is just, just, yes, I have reached nirvana and it is as citrusy as I always knew it would be, wait, whoa, what is Professor Murphy doing here wearing a lifeguard uniform? Please don’t save me, please don’t save me, please don’t save me,” and then BEEP BEEP BEEP BEEP BEEP, it’s 8 AM and reality sets in and man! are you thirsty!Because you’re the educated sort, Toby, you’ve got at least six books—one being a dream dictionary. Not surprisingly, you find there’s a whole chapter dedicated to Dew Dreams. And what you conclude, then, is that your body is telling you to switch to Mtn Dew® Baja Blast ® Zero Sugar—created for sugar-scrapping Dew Heads. (Er, Dewds?) People who want that cult-classic Dew taste, but who also want a break from sugar. How thoughtful. How generous. How perfectly perfect.Mountain Dew® Baja Blast® Zero Sugar—the stuff your future dreams are made of.
